I have that Monday after a conference, can't seem to get out of bed and get my brain moving, hangover. If you've read my live blogging, or just noticed the annoying posts, you'll know that I was at Mom 2.0 in Houston. Two of my readers got so disgusted by the live blogging that they dropped me from their feed readers. Guess What? As much as my mouth really wants to apologize for that, I'm not going to. I actually truly enjoyed live blogging my experience during those sessions and I feel like it was some pretty good information. Read it or don't. Unfollow me or don't. What I do matters. That is the takeaway and maybe it doesn't matter to you but it does to someone.
Now all I really need to figure out is what it is that I do.
And who does it matter to?
Yes, I'm in one of those introspective, what am I doing with my life, modes.
What do I do?
The most important thing that I do is mother my children. Now comes the question, how well do I do that? I'm not asking you to answer that question, I'm just saying it is something I've been thinking about a lot. Just because I work while my children are away does not necessarily mean that I'm doing the best for them during those hours. Part of the equation is my sanity and my fulfillment - but if I'm not doing right by my family neither of those things are going to be in balance.
My experiences with Disney and Mom 2.0 over past two weeks have really gotten my juices flowing. Not just my creative juices, but those annoying head game juices, that start asking you at random times of the day, "So, what are you doing?", "Is this what you want to be doing?", "How does this help you reach your goals?", "What are your goals anyway?".
What am I doing? I'm not sure I really know anymore. In my efforts to create a career for myself I have ended up walking into a number of opportunities that I thought were moving me in the right direction. I'm not so sure anymore. While I was in Houston, I had to handle emails and phone calls concerning aspects of a particularly challenging project. As I sat in different sessions, one half of my brain thinking of solutions to my project problems, and one half being thoroughly inspired by the panelists, I began to realize that I'm not doing what it is that I want to do. I want to be one of those people who knows what my passion is and let's it drive me to this place of great self confidence. What I do matters, but until it matters to me it doesn't really do anyone a whole lot of good.
How does one get to that place? What is my passion?