Two posts in one day? This is my space and now you are my personal shrink, so belly up and listen to me, suckers!
My "how do I find my passion" question earlier today has been nagging at me. If I keep looking and pursuing, reading, digging, and blindly trying to fit my square ass into every triangular space that appears, maybe something will click. 'cause that is how it happens, right? I know it isn't true and that my passion will "hit me on the head" some day when I least expect it but damn it, it makes me feel good to put my head in the sand and dig. That's what I do.
I have this nervous, annoyingly manic need for resolution. I never go to bed mad and it drives my husband crazy. How are men able to have an argument and then just close their eyes and fall into REM sleep within minutes? If you are mad at me, I'll nag you until we've resolved it. I don't let things go and, while it might be considered a weakness, it works for me. I think. Maybe not, but shut-up and let me finish writing....
It's at times like these that my inner yogi needs to get of her ass and smack me around a little.
It occurred to me, while standing on my head during yoga class this evening, that I actually have been pursuing a passion of sorts. I love what I do - I've proclaimed my love for what I do all over this blog and twitter. I love to read, write, talk, tweet, and gush about marketing, networking and social media. There are parts of what I'm doing that I really really love .... like giggle, hug myself when cool stuff happens, love. The fact is that I need to pull up my big-girl panties and realize that I'm headed in the right direction but that there are bumps along the way. One impossible project cannot derail me. I still think there is some passion searching to do but I'm not sure that we aren't supposed to be continually evolving and searching throughout our lives. I recall a famous quote, "It's not a very big step from contentment to complacency." We must strike a balance and keeping complacency at bay. I like this idea.... especially because it justifies my need to keep moving.
Activity, exercise, sweating and breathing are things I can't live without. My travel schedule over the past few weeks has not allowed for this and I'm 120% sure that my state of mind is always directly related to the state of affairs with my physical being. I'm not an ohm, chanting, earthy yogi but there is something about yoga that puts me in a great place.
So the lesson here is this: when facing personal, emotional, life questioning crises, head straight to a yoga class and shake your junk upside down 'til it moves from your ass to your brain.